Nutty trying to be a vampire (She forgot the sparkles;)

―An awesome meme on Youtube
"Confound it! It is like watchin' a train wreck"
―Mark Twain on Nuttymadam
"What the hell is that?"
―Oscar Wilde on Nuttymadam
―Winston Churchill on Nuttymadam
"I like tomatoes."
―Unknown on Nuttymadam
"What a pig."
―spellbreakerko from YouTube
―Another awesome meme on Youtube
"Let us kill her in the name of the Terran Dominion!"
―Angelonius Mengsk on the eve of the Battle of Braxis
"She did read one (Stephen King book)... two pages of one, to be exact. You see, she just couldn't stand all the complex character development and intriguing plot going on. Said it was "boring""
―Razor9350 from YouTube

"The imperialist pig must be destroyed if we are to meet our destiny. The SCUD Launchers are ready, Commander. We will soon rejoice in our victory."
― Kanwar Khan briefing the GLA commander during their internet "liberation"

Emma Clark (also known as Nuttymadam on the internet, born January 17, 1987) is a die-hard, batshit insane Twilight fan, or Twihard (see Taxons of Fans), known for her catchphrase 'UMAZING BOOOOOOOOOOOOK'

She is the fattest whale ever recorded that she eats three hundred shops a day, 5000000 burgers and 5678900 humans and that's just her breakfast!

Affectionately known as "Nutty," "Whale," "Moby Dick," "Wankergirl," and "Snorlax," she calls haters 'wanks' because she can't use it in its real context. (She denies that she herself is a wanker.) Her YouTube username is not nuttymadam, but nuttymadam3575. (Probably her weight, amirite?) She is currently twenty-seven years old (for srs).


She is known for her Y
ouTube videos, which have been described as terrifying, disturbing and pathetic. These show her talk, rant, blither, rant, bitch, moan and squeal over Twilight, its haters and Stephenie Meyer. Of course, she makes other noises too, such as singing (oh God the singing...), screaming and crying. When angry, she has been seen puffing her cheeks up and then vibrating her lips, making a kind of unattractive spitting sound. Analysts and behavior experts believe this to be some kind of warning/threatening gesture, but they cannot be certain. Snorlax is most likely related to a pufferfish.

Her MySpace page shows us this specimen believes she will marry RPattz, the poor guy in the future. However, from past behavior, it can be safely extrapolated that she can get off her rocks off just as well with a cardboard cutout. This also proves that she is a wanker.

She is known to capture her times of excitement to share them with the entire world. Thanks for all you do, Nuts.

The only good things about her being on Youtube are:

  1. She's so much fun to make fun of.
  2. She works with a man who says New Moon is worse than the Holocaust (Ehh...) and that he would rather slit his wrists than go see On-Screen Fail The Second. Even though he sending messages that should not be sent, we appluade him. We wouldn't make it through a day working with her. He is seen in the video "New Moon....OBVIOUSLY."

Fandoms and Interests Edit

65896 BULL


While none of her interests are apparently as obsessive as Twilight (many of her hobbies appear to center around Twilight fandom), she also likes, according to her YouTube profile, Harry Potter (im-freaking possible), Marked, Buffy, Angel, Charmed, and Anne Rice, amongst many others. She seems to have a large interest in vampire fiction, which makes her love of Meyerpires quite confusing. Her obsession seems to be in a class of its own, and has cost her friends that suggested that it might not be healthy. She has stated that Twilight helped her depression.

She has also stated that she works in a phone store. So, if you're ever travelling 'round Carlisle, or somewhere in Northwest England, make sure you have your SIM Card. There's a bit of advice the guidebooks won't tell you.

She also has an interest in food,considering she is a Tub of Lard. Also, she weighs......30 FRIGGIN STONE(which is 420 pounds)!

My lord, I'm suprised she doesn't have heart attacks frenquently...